That Time I Wasn’t a Feminist

To those who know me as I am right now, you more than likely know me as something of a staunch feminist. I pretty inherently abhor labels, but proudly wear that one.


Yet there was a time, not too long ago, in which I would have cringed at the term feminist; I was repulsed by the it.

Why? How was that possible? Didn’t I believe in equal pay for men and women? Didn’t I admire countless women in leadership roles, even aspire to be one? Continue reading


just love.

my thoughts on being more like Jesus

Growing up in church, I heard versions of the phrase ‘hate the sin, love the sinner’ far more often than anyone would really like.

I want to talk about that phrase today.

A few summers ago, I went to Uganda on a mission trip.

The main purpose of the trip was to serve as a vessel for God’s love, to share His relentless affection with the many homeless boys who, for most of their lives, had not received enough of it. Because I was there to love, I doled and doted each of those kids with infinite kindness and care; I shared freely every ounce of space within my heart. Continue reading

try on more shoes: thoughts on racist america

So America, we’ve been talking a lot about race lately, and I think that’s great. I think equality is a wonderful, yet dizzying concept.

I read an article by Nylon about a guy on Tumblr who takes popular movies and edits them down to only the lines spoken by people of color; the results, as you would expect, are glaringly short snippets from incredibly popular movies like The Fault in Our Stars and Her. Reading about it is disappointing, and reminds me of how great it would be to live in a society where that guy didn’t feel the need to point out such a problem. Kendrick Lamar Album CoverAnd then there was the release of Kendrick Lamar‘s video for Alright, which caused conservative, white media to actually just die. A beautifully done, chilling video chock full of depth and symbolism representing what Kendrick Lamar perceives to be true regarding racial injustice in our modern society.

Continue reading

what about marriage?

If you follow the news, and you’re into social issues, then you’re probably aware that there’s recently been a great deal going on across the country regarding gay rights.


If you don’t follow the news, or you’re unaware that a lot has been happening on the equality front, then don’t beat yourself up about it. It’s taken me 22 years to take any interest whatsoever into putting forth even the slightest effort to stay up to date with what’s going on in the world, and even now, I find it difficult to choose news articles and updates over Workaholics reruns or interviews with Jack Antonoff. Nonetheless, it has been happening. Big moves in the direction of equality.

I’ll catch you up.

Continue reading

another post about feminism


In today’s society we toss this F word around a lot, yet I can’t help but think a lot us are just missing the mark.

Feminism is a lot like a job in consulting or the phrase “hooking up” in that nobody knows what it actually means. Not to say we’re all completely clueless, it’s just that the concept and history of feminism is complex, intricate, and at times difficult to understand. Continue reading

in defense of equality

I’ve tried a million times over to write on this subject. Grappling with how specific, or how deep, I wanted to go regarding the issue at hand. I’ve started a million drafts of this same post, and told myself not to worry about it, that I didn’t want my blog to be so serious, that I wanted to keep things fun and light. Yet somehow, here I am, pressed to finally publish this. I see too much hurt and pain and hate and judgement all around me to stay quiet.

I’ve never quite fit in, and for most of my life, I’ve always wanted to. I saw the popular kids just as they wanted to be seen, as cooler than me, better than me, something to aspire to be. It makes sense that I’d think this way; I grew up in a small southern town where rank and status are paramount. But even when I made it on the inside, I didn’t feel right; I didn’t feel like I belonged. I felt nervous around the people I called my friends; I constantly felt like I needed to prove my worth to them. I’ve spent the vast majority of my almost 22 years tailoring my own personality, interests, and opinions to the group of elite around me for fear that I would not be accepted as myself. I’ve spent all that time hiding who I am, and building up walls, to make sure that no one can hurt me for being truly me. Continue reading